pocket full of miracles

i guess its my fault
they say you always control the outcome, no matter what.
so is it my fault?

did i somehow provoke this?
was it me that caused my own heart to ache.
well no one cares enough to tell me the answer. because we all have our own fucking problems ya know?
its like when your walking past someone and you ask "how are you?"
do you really want to know?
i honestly doubt it, we fake sincerity
just like he fakes the sincerity of being sorry..or maybe its the cause.
maybe its me.
it is me.

i find myself not forgiving because im never forgetting.
for some reason i always tend to think back...its a curse.
it really is a curse to be able to remember each exact little thing people say.
because sometimes i wish people were able to lie to me just so i dont feel the pain of them actually lying.
then again i wish people did not have to lie.

its like if you know your going to regret it, why even do it? why try and hide as long as you can? is it worth it?
thats really the question...worth.
and i think most of us dont want to know the answer.

i hate when people do those things, where like once they do it theyre already planning how to explain it. because it isnt like they dont know its bad because theyre already planning how to excuse themselves.
honestly, i hate excuses i mean excuses are like asses everyone has one and only shit comes out.

maybe i ask to much of humanity
maybe im the flaw of humanity
maybe just maybe...